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September 24, 2025, Peru — Sacred Valley, Pisac. The second Ayahuasca ceremony during the Human Design, Gene Keys, and Plant Medicine retreat. It was one of the most important experiences of my life — perhaps even of many of my lifetimes on Earth.
A few hours before the ceremony, I had a coconut ice cream. A simple, sweet moment, yet it stayed with me — as if my body already knew it needed a small earthly anchor before stepping into the unknown. Then came the first cup of Ayahuasca, and it opened the gate. Immediately, a wave of despair so piercing arose that I felt it in every cell of my being. The despair of cows giving milk, knowing their calves would be taken and killed. It wasn’t a thought, nor a vision — it was embodiment. A physical, crushing pain unlike anything I had ever known.
Then came the feelings of parents losing their children. A vast, bottomless grief, unbearable and yet unavoidable. Passing through that fire, something extraordinary happened — suddenly, space for humility opened. Humility before life, before suffering, before the fragility of existence. Within that humility, there was a sense of sacrifice — and with it, Grace.
In the following hours, as the music of our shamans filled the space, a completely different state arose. A sense of being transported through time, of joy, fulfillment, awe at the healing vibration of the icaros. The room was pulsing with energy beyond words. The depth was immense — from the darkest emotions to an unimaginable ecstasy.
In that state, I saw the presence of Jesus Christ, radiating pure love and acceptance. His being embraced all of us in the ceremony with one heart. It was Communion in its purest form. At that moment, I saw my Siddhi in the conscious Sun — my life’s path revealed in its full brilliance. Ecstasy is far too weak a word to describe what I was experiencing.
One ceremony carried me from the depths of agony to the absolute peak of bliss. Never before had I believed that such profound states of joy could be touched here on Earth. The Ayahuasca ceremonies opened the gate for me to truly feel — not just imagine — what Siddhi is. They showed me that Earth holds within it both the hell of war and suffering, and the heaven of light and grace. The path always leads from darkness into light, just like in the alchemical process: from dissolution to wholeness, from Nigredo to Rubedo.
What matters most is that this was not an idea or a theory but a living experience that penetrated my body and heart. From this moment on, I know that Siddhi is not a concept in a book but a real state that can be embodied. And that the body itself — through both suffering and ecstasy — is the gate through which Grace becomes real.
